August 6, 2010

Tomorrow. She's finally coming tomorrow! It's so hard to believe. In retrospect, I can say that the last 9 months have flown by but I know that in the moment, each and every day felt painfully long. Today is the very last of those 9 months of long days. For some reason, I decided to work right on up to the very end, so I'm sitting at my desk typing this after having made it clear to everyone in my office that though I may be here physically, mentally she's already in my arms. I spent the last 2 weeks busting my ass and tying up all my loose ends, so I've sat here with nothing to do for the last few days. It's definitely not helping the days pass any faster. At this very moment, it's 10:44am. That means I have exactly 5 hours and 46 minutes left until my maternity leave begins - assuming my brain is functioning well enough to do that calculation correctly. I had to re-do my leave slips 5 or 6 times before I finally got them right, so I'm not putting much faith in my brain right now.

Tonight Logan will be staying with my parents and Kyle is taking me out for our "last meal". I'm not allowed to eat or drink anything after midnight so we're planning on a big dinner at one of our very favorite restaurants. I then intend to eat my leftovers - because I always have leftovers when we eat there- at about 11:30 before I go to bed. I MIGHT decide to bring home a piece of tiramisu to have with my late night meal as well. I've become pretty accustomed to eating 2 breakfasts every day, so not being allowed to eat anything before my 1:30pm c-section is really going to make me grouchy. Super grouchy. That's 2 whole meals that I'll have to skip! It would not be an exaggeration to say that I might actually be dreading that more than the spinal.

Aside from my fear of startving to death before my child is born, we're so ready for this! Vivienne's room is perfect, her laundry has been washed and put away, her carseat is installed, and our bag is packed. The last few days I've tried to write a letter for her to read when she's older, but I just can't find the words. I don't want it to be generic or cliche and that's all I seem to come up with. Hopefully I'll feel more inspired tomorrow night after all our hospital visitors have gone home and it's just the 3 of us enjoying a quiet moment together. I think that's when it will all finally hit us...she's here and our family is truly complete. I can't wait to see her in my husband's arms. That's the moment that he'll find out what it feels like to love someone unconditionally. It's a life changing moment and I'm so grateful to be the one to give him that gift.

So please keep us in your thoughts and prayers tomorrow - especially around lunch time. As common as c-sections have become, they are still major surgery and I'm a little nervous about it all, even though I made it through the first one perfectly fine. I'll post pictures as soon as I'm able, but it may take me about a week. Climbing up and down stairs is apparently a no-no which means I'll be confined to our 2nd floor while I recover because that's where our only bathroom is. Unfortunately, our computer resides on the 1st floor, so I won't have access until I can manage the stairs, but maybe I can talk my sister into logging in here for me to post some pics. We'll see.

Enjoy your weekend ladies! The next time you see me, I'll be skinnier!  :)

PS. I now have 5 hours and 10 minutes left until maternity leave!